When I facilitate, I make sure to be full of ressources: sleep, clarity, love, hope and attentiveness. I make sure to feel my body because it is my secret sidekick. It recognizes shifts in dynamics before I do (if we stay in the dichotomy for a sec) and most of all it is my key instrument to “hold a space”, which means to create a physical room with also an atmosphere that allows people to contribute with all they have got. I make sure that I know exactly what I am here for, what I want to achieve and contribute and that I actually really want to do so. I make sure that I embody deep in my cells that I deeply respect people for who they are and where they are at and that I don’t want to change them. I make sure that I know deep down in my cells (and this is the hardest one) that I cannot control what is going to happen. I can only invite people again and again to be there, be alert and open, be engaged, to try something new.

Facilitating life: Incremental change or game changer

Needless to say that it would be more than wonderful if I could treat any living organism on this planet from this place all the time. But to start with myself, if I’m honest, the rest of my work life I often feel like I have to deliver and would like to move faster than I do while at the same time knowing that these are not the conditions that allow me to contribute with all I have got. Funny, how it’s always hard to practice what you preach, especially in the way you treat yourself. I’m learning and unlearning slowly. One thing I have been experimenting with is discipline.

A new kind of discipline

In my twenties I ran several marathons. I was fascinated by discipline, physical exertion and testing limits. Mostly because I was curious to figure out what states of consciousness I would be able to reach. My kind of drugs. I learned that some of the assumed limits were easy to cross, others that were not on my radar were hard to even notice in time. I started to experiment with what physical changes I can induce by changing my mindset. Later in life, when I co-founded a company and became a parent at almost the same time, I became super efficient. But now, I am not so interested in neither discipline nor efficiency any more.

I experiment with what happens if I actually do practice what I preach. I opened up a new dichotomy and I am now holding space for my future-me, a person I deeply respect for what she is and where she is at, a person I am curious to get to know and that I trust has everything she needs to make her own decisions. I invite her to do her morning routine every morning by setting up the physical environment and making sure she is aware of what is important to her. But I am not offended if she decides to not follow my invitation. I trust she has good reasons for what she does and I invite her again the next morning.